Just Ask Elizabeth: Dealing With Different Opinions

Dear Elizabeth,

I encounter people who have different opinions than mine almost daily. They never seem to really want to talk but instead spew their opinions at me without any regard to my views. I am often shocked but not surprised, given our world today. Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with this?

Signed,
Shocked in Scranton

Dear Shocked in Scranton,

The same thing often happens to me. I thought certain people were my friends but only wanted to lecture me. I listen to them, make eye contact, and say, “Just because I disagree with you does not mean I hate you. We can all have our own opinions and still respect one another. Let’s do that.” I pause, walk away, and let them think about it. Our next interaction is always a better one. Maybe this will work for you, too.

Just Ask Elizabeth: Two Sets Of House Rules

Dear Elizabeth,

Consistency in rules matters. My grandchildren have different sets of rules at different parents’ houses. They now are following whatever rules they want and where they want. Help.

Signed,
Help Needed in Harrison

Dear Help Needed in Harrison,

My best suggestion is to have the two parent parties agree on one set of rules and have them be consistent about enforcing those rules in both homes. Be very clear on the rewards for following the rules and the consequences for breaking those rules. Help your grandchildren be the best they can by encouraging the adults to set up the same rules for both homes. Always do what is best for the children, people. They come first.

Just Ask Elizabeth: Being A Doggie Auntie

Dear Elizabeth,

I am a super auntie, but now I have become a doggie auntie! Your thoughts?

Signed,
Doggie Auntie in Dover

Dear Doggie Auntie in Dover,

How fun! I am a doggie auntie, too, and love every moment with the dogs. All the neighborhood dogs are “adopting” me as well. I seem to have become a “dog magnet” and are having more fun than ever. Be sure to carry doggie treats wherever you go. I hope that you enjoy this doggie time as much as I do!

Just Ask Elizabeth: Shopping For Others Instead

Dear Elizabeth,

I am now retired but still love to shop, especially for shoes. I want to cut back on my shopping. Do you have any suggestions?

Signed,
Shoe Shopper in Sacramento

Dear Shoe Shopper in Sacramento,

I, too, love shoe shopping. Instead of always just shopping for me, I now shop for the children in my family. They love choosing new school shoes twice a year, and I enjoy shopping with them. Try it. This works for me, and their smiles say it all.

Just Ask Elizabeth: Tipping at the Drive-Through

Dear Elizabeth,

What are your thoughts about tipping your drive-through servers?

Signed,
Fast Food in Fresno

Dear Fast Food in Fresno,

I recently started tipping my Dunkin’ check out server. The “smile and thank you” when I handed them a dollar or two was well worth it. I got a big smile, a big thank you or “I really appreciate that” as I handed them a tip. We should all remember that small gestures really do mean a lot. Try it and you will also receive a big “thank you” and feel not so bad as you eat that donut.

Thanks for the great idea KN.

Just Ask Elizabeth: Super Auntie

Dear Elizabeth,

I love being an auntie. Do you have any unique ideas for teenage birthday gifts?

Signed,
Needing Ideas in Nazareth

Dear Needing Ideas in Nazareth,

I also love being an auntie. My nieces and nephews receive gifts, some small, some larger, based on their age. Just this weekend, I rewarded a 14-year old with, you guessed it, 14 presents. Not all gifts are large, but all come from a gift list generated by the teenager. It makes shopping easier and makes the teenager happy. They all love it and so do I!